Helena Douglas Has Wrestling Moves 7

when we last left our heroine, she was getting along swimmingly with Zack. the two now fully aware of how fond of each other they are are now adjusting to life as a couple. Zack determined to show her every inch of his life has begun to give Helena the grand tour of his city home away from home.

Zack: and this is my living room. it's not much, but it's always ready for fun. in addition to a pool table and an oldschool styled jukebox converted to play both cds and mp3's I also have my own complete dj station,... it does everything from mix and edit songs to being capable of hosting my own private karaoke night in full surround sound coming from hidden speakers all over the house.

Helena: you have karaoke!!?!? (finally, a chance to impress Zack back,... he done so much for me, I'll give him the performance of a lifetime!! I read once in a magazine that guys like enthusiastic, flirty, and spontaneous women who aren't afraid of touching them,... I'd better crank it up a notch since he thought of me so much.  ...  ) Yeeeeeee! you think of me so much Zack!! of course I'm always ready to sing, as a professional I take great pride in any song at all!! I'm so excited!! race you!!

Helena in her "excitement" then did everything in her power to be energetically spontaneous,... including shoving Zack testicles first into the pocket of his pool table without noticing. the impact of the blow was enough to cause such intense pain that Zack couldn't even muster up a scream to go with the agony. Helena unaware of the damage went to bend over in front over the only set of visible speakers in order to be more flirtatious.

Helena: wow, limited edition speakers!! mmm,... and they were produced this year too!! you've really outdone yourself with this hidden mansion of yours. you really seem to be a man of great hidden class. (wait a sec, didn't that magazine say men like to teach and lead women? now's a good chance to woman things up!) Oh monsieur Zack,... I am aving' trouble wis' zese American controls, could you help me? I feel like zuch' a silly girl... ( zat' ought to do it... he'll be all over me in a minute.)

Helena wiggled her hips and butt a bit to draw extra attention to herself. curious at the lack of sound that Zack was making, Helena as flirty as she could muster turned around to imply her approval of any perverse act Zack could come up with. she found Zack on his knees biting his lip.

Helena: oh my, monsieur Zack,... I ave' seen that face on the internet,... this is so sudden. it's okay, I don't mind if you stare at my ow' you say "dat ass". I won't even mind if you want to say it out loud,... I'm sure no one watching, it will be our little naughty secret.

Zack: dem... nuts...

Helena: sacre' bleu!! dem nuts!? ow' dirty of you,... you naughty boy.   ,... what would you like me to do to "dem nuts"? (kind of weird for Zack but zis' could be fun...)

Zack: dem... nuts...

Helena: wait a second... OH NO!! WHAT AVE' I DONE TO ZIS POOR SWEET MAN!? HERE, LET ME HELP YOU!

Helena then as gently as she was able to helped Zack from to floor to the couch. she held Zack close like a child and lamented the unintentional harm she had caused.

Helena: I'm so sorry monsieur Zack, are you hurt? is the pain bad? I will get uo' zome' ice.

Zack doubled over on the couch as Helena scrambled to get him some ice for his "injury".

Helena: there, does that feel any...

Zack then suddenly sat up, and reached out, fondling Helena's chest.

Zack: Dem Boobs... (bites lip)

Helena: better?... I ave' an aching suspicion that you will be just fine. that iz' not very funny by ze way,... I was worried about you. I will tolerate your taking advantage of my chest zis' one and only time, it is my fault in a way so I won't hit you.

Zack: Thanks by the way,... I could tell you put a lot of effort into making me feel better,... when we have kids one day you'll make a good mother. try not to spoil them too much though...

Helena: (YEEEEEEEE!!! he's interested in me!! it's working!! ze book also said "if you are sure he is interested, pull away a bit and let him come to you.") just because I may nurse your wounds doesn't mean that you can be sure that I will nurse a house of five children for you (I only want 4, lol )... you and your silly, um, um,... ( I need something to make fun of,... but he's so perfect... what's that on his neck? is that a tattoo?)... neck tattoo! why would you get a tattoo there anyway... you may be cute and decently handsome, but that just seems out of place. why would you get it so flesh colored... don't tribal tattoos usually come in black???

Zack: that's not a neck tattoo, that's a scar. I'm not the brightest, but I sure ain't that dumb.

Helena: a scar? interesting... and what could you have been doing that could put a scar on the back of your neck? were you skiing backwards, you silly silly man?

Zack: nope. I got that scar from from being splashed with molten metal.

Helena: molten metal? that sounds painful,... when did this happen?

Zack: when the doatek building exploded there was fire and molten metal flying everywhere,... a little landed on me when I was on that rope ladder stopping you from making the biggest mistake of both our lives. we sure made out lucky that day, I'm surprised the chopper didn't explode from the heat... that's the third thing I thought after it happened, the first thought was "god damn that's hot!!", the second thing was "is it supposed to smell like bacon?",... lol.

Helena: GASP!! you could have been killed!! what if the metal burned through your spine, you could have been paralyzed!! all this time you never said a word about zis'? why didn't you tell me you were hurt so badly for me? (he must think I'm such an idiot teasing the wound he took for my sake,...)

Zack: one it's just the out layer of skin, I'm mostly fine, and two I didn't want to worry you, that's all. it might sound awkward hearing it but you do kind of mean the world to me,... a little or whatever,... you know. what? what're you looking at me like like that for!? something in my teeth?

Helena then without a word jumped upon zack, pinning him down. her eyes locked with Zack and a very pleased expression spread across her face.

Helena: monsieur Zack,... I never formally thanked you for all you've done for me, so I want ou' to know two secrets. one, you did it... you saved my life and you are a hero and a star,... and I'm a star fucker...

Helena than began kissing Zack very deeply and aggressively, almost hyper ventilating in her excitement. Zack was being pushed to the edge of being smothered under her as she almost very literally was nearly sucking the breath out of him. the phone rang in Zack's pocket which both of them ignored at first... however after the fifth time of allowing it to go to voice mail Zack decided that the only way to shut it up would be to answer it. Helena aknowleged this though not without significant protest and rage.

Zack: hello? (sorry Helena,... it'll be just a sec.)

Helena: I don't see why you should answer zat' stupeed' stupeed' phone!! I'm supposed to be the most important person to you, you know.  It better not be some strange woman...

Tina: Zack!! FUUUUUUUUCK YOU ZACK,... YOU SIDEWINDER!! WHERE IN THE HELL ARE YOU HIDIN' AT?? WHERE'S HELENA!? YOU CAN'T RUN FROM ME YA' YELLA' BELLIED DONKEY!!

Zack: OMFG!! what's your problem!? why is it always random insults and venom with you Tina? how did you get this number? May I add that I noticed you're sounding particularly shrill tonight. (-___-") anyways, what do you want? I'm very much in the middle of something.

Helena: wait!?... ZACK DID YOU JUST SAY TINA??? WHY DOES SHE HAVE YOUR PHONE NUMBER!? (zat' dirty American beetch! she said she'd never date Zack, yet she has his phone number!?!?

Tina: don't play dumb with me Zack!! where's helena? I swear when I get my hands on you yer' gonna be in a heap of trouble!! I'm gonna bury you under the pen!! you pig!

Zack: under the pen? is that some new slang you picked up at the coyote ugly bar Tina?? all this crap you always putting me through is gonna catch up to you one day. charma's a bitch. you need to shape up.

Helena: YOU DEFINITELY SAID TINA JUST NOW!! WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO ZAT' BEETCH'!? WHY DOES SHE KNOW YOUR PHONE NUMBER!?

Zack: it's nothing like that Helena. she must have got it from mila, this phone is new,... dammit Tina stop yelling in my ear!

Tina: WHO ARE YOU THREATENING, YOU SICK FUCK!? YOU CAN SUCK A BAG OF DICKS YOU KNOW THAT!! TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE RIGHT NOW!! I'M COMING OVER, AND I'M BRINGING THE GIRLS!! IT'S GONNA BE A FEEDING FRENZY AND WE'RE SERVING "YOU STEW"!! PUT HELENA ON THE LINE, I KNOW YOU'VE GOT HER THERE WITH YOU!!

Zack: Helena, she said she wants to talk to you about something.

Helena: DON'T GIVE ME THAT SHIT'! JUST DUMP HER AND GET OVER YOURSELF ZACK!! I HAVE NO TIME FOR HER NOR YOUR STUPEED' GAMES OF ZE' HEART!!

Tina: YEEEEEAAAAAAAARRGG!! GIVE HELENA THE PHONE RIGHT NOW!!

Helena: HOLY SHIT IS THAT BEETCH' EVER LOUD!! GET RID OF HER!! GET RID OF HER!! (I can't let Zack see me getting jealous,... but I'm so jealous I could scream! why won't he just hang up!?)

Zack: hold on, Tina never calls me,... something may be wrong and she wants you!

Helena: Zat Beetch' is just mad because of ze' match earlier. HANG UP ON HER!! HANG UP ON HER!!

Zack: it might be serious, are you sure you won't take the phone? it could be...

Helena: Zat' Beetch' is the worst person I know!! NO!! I don't want to talk to her EVER!! TELL HER SHE CAN'T BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND, OR WIFE, OR ANYTHING!!

Tina: Zack, YOU FUCKIN' ANSWER ME RIGHT NOW!! WHERE'S HELENA!? IF YOU HURT HER YOU'RE DEAD MEAT!!

Zack: BITCH!! I THREW THE MATCH!! AND BY THE WAY,... HELENA DOESN'T WANT TO TALK TO YOU BECAUSE SHE SAYS YOU'RE A BITCH!! NOW QUIT YELLING AT ME AND TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT!! YOUR NOT MY GIRLFRIEND HAVE NO RIGHT YOU ALWAYS YELL AT ME!!

Tina: AS IF YOU DON'T ALREADY KNOW WHAT I WANT YOU PERVERT!! YOU'RE KEEPING HER OFF THE PHONE ON PURPOSE!! I'M GONNA STOMP A MUDHOLE IN YER' ASS ZACK!!

Zack: YOU'RE ALWAYS LIKE THIS EVERY TIME I TALK TO YOU!! IT'S ALWAYS "I'LL DO THIS, YOU'RE SO DEAD ZACK" THAT. YOU'RE LIKE A BROKEN RECORD!! WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT OUT OF MY LIFE!? WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS SO MAD AND MEAN TO ME!? YOU DICK!!

TINA: WHO YOU CALLIN' A DICK, YOU BIG PUSSY!! THEY'RE GONNA GIVE YOU THE CHAIR FER SURE!!

Helena: (I can't stand it!! that whore is ruining everything!! she thinks she can just be loud and demand attention,... this bitch doesn't know the meaning of loud!! zis' means war!!)

Helena pushes a few buttons and suddenly the instrumental  for "you belong with me" by taylor swift began to wail from every speaker in the house,... resulting in minor earthquakes that shook everything not nailed down in the house. Helena grabbed the microphone and struck her very best rocker pose.

Helena: YOOOOUUUUR OOONN THE PHOOONEE WIIIITH TIIIINA,... AND SHE'S A TOOL!!
SHEEE'S GOOOIIING OOOFF ABOUT SOOOMEETHIIING CAAUUSE SHE'S A BITCH AND A FOOL!!
CAAUUSE SHE DOESN'T SEE A HERO LIKE I DO!!

the resulting noise of Helena's yelling put a hairline crack in the wall and startled Zack so much that the phone shot out of his hand as he reeled back. Helena was now fully consumed by her jealousy as she snatched the phone from midair.

Helena: FINE! IF TALKING TO THAT WHORE WILL GET RID OF HER THEN GIVE ME ZE' FUCKING PHONE!!

Helena gripped the phone angrily and awkwardly as if to somehow choke Tina through it.

Tina: Helena!! thank god!! is that nasty man hurtin' you? what sounds like taylor swift? I knew Zack was messed up but that takes the cake!!

Helena: nasty man?.... NASTY MAN!?

Helena flew into a sea of rage so deep that she couldn't even form an insult to throw at Tina. Helena pinned Zack's head to the couch to prevent Zack from taking the phone away even though he was making no attempts to take the phone and struggled frantically for air underneath her hand. tears welled up in Helena's eyes as she blinked them back.

Helena: Tina,... all I can say is I will never forgive you,... you treat people horribly,... do you ever look at the situations you create? I'm in Zack's secret apartment house in manhattan, so if you are worried stop looking for me. I don't want your fake sympathy, I'll find a way to be fine without it. I will tell you one thing for sure,... STAY AWAY FROM ZACK!! DO YOU HEAR ME!? I DON'T WANT YOU TO GET ANYWHERE NEAR HIM!! KEEP YOUR DISTANCE IF YOU KNOW WHAT IS GOOD FOR YOU!! I SWEAR IF YOU GET ANYWHERE NEAR HIM I CANNOT GUARANTEE YOUR SAFETY!! GET WITHIN 5 FEET OF HIM AND I SWEAR YOU WILL BE SERIOUSLY FUCKED!! JUST FORGET ABOUT ZACK,... AND FURTHER MORE I WANT YOU TO FORGET ABOUT ME! I'LL BE FINE SOMEHOW AND I WILL BE THE ONE TO TAKE CARE OF ZACK!! GOODBYE FOREVER!!

Helena then spiked Zack's cellphone to the ground, obliterating it completely.

Tina: Ayane, did you catch all that? still think I'm lying?

Ayane reveals herself on the roof with and the fierceness of the gargoyles there.

Ayane: you were right Tina,... it looks like Zack is keeping Helena in his own personal rape dungeon. even swift bullets are too good for him. let's make him suffer.

Mila: and that's the story officer. we have to help her.

Christie: I see,... let's roll. (these fools don't know it's me, as usual. this could be a perfect chance to kill Helena and make it look like an accident.  mwahahahahaha!)

Mila: TO THE TINA-MOBILE!!

Tina: STOP CALLING IT THAT!!

Helena then looking at the broken phone realizing how vile her actions were right in front of Zack began to break down. she crouched down gripped her head which only made he feel more embarrassed and ashamed as tears streamed down her face.

Helena: I'm such an idiot,... Idiot,... IDIOT!! now you know just how jealous I can be!! this is so humiliating!! how can everything be going so wrong all at the same time!? first I hurt you, then I insult the scar you got saving me, then I acted jealous and moody, yelled in your ear, cracked you wall, smothered your face,... and now I've broken your brand new phone. I can't even blame you if you want to break up with me,... I'm being such an idiot and a failure as a girlfriend.  please don't leave me,... I'm just acting crazy because being with you was almost like,... like having a family again! don't hate me!! PLEASE DON'T HATE ME!!... I can be better I swear!! it's just when I think of having to share you with that horrible woman.. I,... I,...

Zack then knelt down beside Helena.

Zack: come here,... shh... shh... it's gonna be okay.

Zack then lifted Helena into a princess carry. Helena struggled to keep her face hidden from Zack.

Helena: don't look at me as I am. I'm ugly when I cry. I don't want you to see me being ugly. I've caused enough trouble...

Zack placed Helena on the couch and grabbed the microphone she had dropped on the floor.

Zack: I want you to listen to me,... my balls and my ears may hurt just a little, but I've never been this happy in my entire life. I've been practicing a song a that makes me think of you,... just listen and don't laugh if I suck at signing, okay?

Baby I See You Working *Hard*
I Want To Let You Know I'm Proud,
Let You Know That I Admire What You Do
Don't Know If I Need To Reassure You,
My Life Would Be Purposeless Without You
If I Want It (have It)
When I Ask You (You Provide It)
You Inspire Me To Be Better
You Challenge Me For The Better
So Sit Back And Let Me Pour Out My Love Letter

Let Me Help You
Take Off Your Shoes
Untie Your Shoestrings
Take Off them earrings
What You Want To Eat Boo?
Let Me Feed You
Let Me Run Your Bathwater
Whatever You Desire, I'll Aspire
Sing You A Song, Turn The Soaps On
I'll Brush Your Hair, And Put Your Head Scarf On
Do You Want A Foot Rub? Do you Want A Manicure?
Baby I'm yours, I Want To Cater To You Girl...






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